Sitnews - Stories in the News - Ketchikan, Alaska




Ketchikan Goose Tales
by Bub Gailey

June 25, 2001

Mona & Picasso photoIt was an early morning in the small garden, birds were chirping, the sky was blue, and the sun was beginning to peek over the treetops. In the shade of a tree, five beautiful geese sat, sleeping away with dreams of their favorite veggies'. One of them stirred.

Mona Rembrandt the Norwegian goose sat up and stretched her chubby legs in the warm sunshine which was slowly creeping over the yard.

"Time for an early breakfast!" She thought. Her beady blue eyes strayed to a tasty looking plant that was fenced in. She waddled over and ripped off a piece of it that was sticking out of a gap. Mmmm. Soon her smacking arose the other geese: Pissario, a tall white china goose with an impressive bump on his forehead, Rita Nessie Manet, a brownish one who stuck her wings out ridiculously on either side of her, Picasso, a small white goose with a little black spot of down on her back, and Matisse, a big silent brown.

"Mona!" Picasso hissed, "We're not supposed to eat anything inside the fences!"Nessie Rita Manet photo

"Nonsense," Mona replied around a mouthful of colorful flowers and greens. "We live in this garden... Therefore, it is our home. And so you see, because it is our home, we can do anything we want." She finished philosophically.

Before the conversation could continue the sound of a wooden gate swinging interrupted. All the geese turned to the black-haired man walking towards them. All at once, they pounded him with a barrage of odd quacks, honks, and squawks.

"FOOD!" The chubby Mona screamed.

"I laid an egg in the garage last night!" Nessie Rita Manet gurgled.

"Me too!" Picasso squealed

"Dick!!!!!" Pissario honked.

This all combined into a terrible din until the excitement of the moment died down. They followed him into the garage with a curious cluck or wheeze here and there. Dick The Goose Gang photobrought out a handful of lettuce and the noise began all over again. All five beaks tore at the leafy parts of the lettuce to shreds.

Young Mr. Prissy Pea Kaku, strikingly different from the geese with his colorful peacock feathers bobbed over to the crowd of squirming geese to see what all the fuss was about. Mr. Kaku thought it was about time they had some exercise too.

For you see... Mr. Prissy Pea Kaku is the, ah... self-anointed king of the universe and protector of the ducks... Vinny Van Gogh, Monet, MickeyAngelo and LynnArdo. On sight of his stalking approach, the geese will run for their feathery lives providing them great exercise and loads of entertainment for Mr.Prissy.

This was just the beginning of a normal day in the garden.


The End.



(Bub is a grandson of the Kauffmans. Goose recording by Bub. Digital photos by Bub and Nana.)



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